Remotes

There is a common belief that the most important thing most guys can hold in their hands is the remote control. I concur with this assumption, for it’s my lifeline, my friend and the one thing they have to pry out of my hand after I fall asleep. It is very important to me being.

Last week, on Friday morning, I was watching the news before leaving for work and I went to turn off the TV and the remote was gone!

I retraced my steps, I was the only one home that week, and no mater what I did the “clicker” was gone!

I walked my way very slowly through my actions that morning and checked everywhere I had been but to no avail. It was missing.

I shut off the TV with the original remote that goes with the set, but what I needed was the cable remote so I could change channels, not using the button on the set. That button would take me forever, as it’s one channel at a time and no numerical pads. Besides, it doesn’t control the cable box and the only channel I use on the set is 3.

I called the cable provider and asked if they sold the remote in their stores, and they did for $15-$20 the woman thought, but she wasn’t sure. She understood my plight and said it usually turns up in the kitchen. I had already looked in the frig, in the microwave and in the garbage.

After work I came home and tried one more time, excused myself to Max the wonder dog, and promised him I’d be right back.

I sped over to the mall, and ran through Sear’s, up the escalator, and over to the cable store. I said to the two ladies sitting quietly at 6:00 p.m., “There’s two things you can do for me, either one of you has to come home with me and help me find my remote, or one of you has to sell me a new one”. They laughed, and said, “Why buy one, you can have one”. They simply handed a new one to me and smiled, I thanked them and left.

My family immediately recognized something was wrong as it’s a slightly different model from the old one, but it’s fine. I admitted my defeat at the hands of fate and we’ve continued. Last night I noted that it’s been almost a week and it hasn’t shown up yet.

This morning I was taking out the trash and the assorted recycling items, and as I was filling a blue bag with newspapers, the old remote showed it’s head in and among the recycled newspapers.

I guess I put it in the papers and put them all away at once. Serves me right for attempting to clean up!