This is the R rated Dinner party

There were seven of us sitting around the dinner table at my house on Friday night, having devoured the appetisers, and the starter, we had moved on to the main course. We had been drinking, wine and beer and some champagne, as it worked with our lobster and cod dinner. Probably it had been a lot of drinking, but it was a good Friday night, warm for February and fun.

The conversation had drifted around to one of my favourites, growing old! My age factor has presented a psychological problem to me, of course, so I often use it for self-deprecating humor etc. My dinner companions including my wife are all 15 to 20 year plus younger than me, so it does make sense to assume they’ll be around here way past my time.

I had been through the piece about my wife saying to me, “I don’t know what I’ll do when you’re gone!” and my response being, “Where am I going?” One of the much younger young ladies blurts out, “Arthur, on your hundredth birthday I’m giving you a blow job!”

Want to know how to stop a crowd? Just shout out stuff like that! Silence filled the room. I think it was one of those spur of the moment events that was regretted as soon as it was said.

The look on my face, the look on her face and the look on her husband’s face were precious. No one present will ever forget that offer. I needed to find the words to express my feelings.

I said that given our respective ages, I probably, if I even know what a blow job is at 100, would not want one from an 80 year old woman! (My apologies to older woman, I needed a back off position).

We all screamed about that for the next hour of so when everyone finally went home.

I sent an email the next morning that said:
What fun! I just wanted to remind you about my upcoming 100th birthday party next week. Funny how these thengs keep popping up!

“What fun! I just want to remind you all about my upcoming 100th Birthday party next week. Funny how these things come up!”