Just “keeping an eye” on me as I deteriorate a bit each year...

Yesterday I had an appointment with the arthritis clinic where I have grown to be a somewhat regular customer. I am a “look at” kind of customer, just “keeping an eye” on me as I deteriorate a bit each year, but so far nothing too bad.

The clinic, part of McMaster University Medical stuff is located in St. Joseph’s hospital. It’s a short trip downtown and a look for a street parking space because at no time have I ever been able to get hospital parking. So I try and find street parking which has gone from meters to machines that distribute tickets.

The good news is that street parking is one dollar an hour and you can get up to three hours parking in a space. For short term visits (appointments) this is great, the only bad news part is if you are in there for an injured leg or knee (as I was), you have to hobble from where ever you parked, However, since I was cured (a miracle of course) it was not a bad four block walk.

All this is background, as the story was in the message. I did remember to write down the appointment in my book at work, fearing to put these things in my computer or my phone as I use three computers and if they speak to each other, I have no way to know it or even care. I just want to write it down. I wrote 2:00 p.m. but since I write somewhat sloppy, I had to call and confirm the timing.

My wife called to remind me to stop at the library and pick up something for her, and I responded that it may not be possible because I was “going to the hospital”. To me this meant I had a clinic appointment for a check of my knee. My wife had no idea I had an appointment made months before, and she heard what I said.

Panic was in her voice! “What’s wrong”, she shouted into the phone and I started to laugh! “Your dear husband is fine, I have an appointment”, I exclaimed. The breathing returned to normal at her end. I was feeling bad for doing that, and I never even thought of the consequences. She married this old man years ago who keeps telling her he’s going to die any moment and suddenly I’m off to the hospital in the middle of the week in the middle of the afternoon! My bad!

I have planned this “surprise” which is hilarious, but I have never had the guts to pull it off. I was going to wait for a time when my wife was out and I was able to predict a return time, and a few minutes before her return I would drape myself down the stairs head first, and wait “unconscious” for her return. She would find me “dead”. She would scream and I would laugh.

I don’t think I’ll ever do that as I could become the widower and never be able to explain what killed her.