Visiting

I’ve been listening to old radio shows lately and they reminded me of “visiting”.

When I was a kid, we used to go visiting on Sunday afternoons sometimes, which seems, to my memory, almost a random stop at the homes of friends and relatives to say hi, and maybe share a coffee or a coke and a cookie or two. This started when I was a toddler, and so my memory of these times is flawed.

We had a car which made us mobile. Many people didn’t have cars, or didn’t have or wouldn’t use the gas rationing coupons to get there. I may not really have this memory, but I still have my ration books from the Second World War and this may just be a thought for me. However, cars were not owned by everyone.

In my neighbourhood as I remember (I was 5 when we moved there), there were cars but not one for every family. During the war cars weren’t available, and there were not models produced from 1942 through 1945. In 1941, more than three million cars were manufactured in the United States. Only 139 more were made during the entire war.

Basically, the used car was at a premium.

We may have had more reasons to visit, as my father was home for a year or two, and my mother was probably trying to get him out of the house, although by the time we moved to the newer place that was over and my father was working. My memory gives out a bit, but visiting is still the focus here.

I think we may have called first to say we were coming, but I’m not sure on this point. Everyone didn’t have a phone, and many people lived in the same neighbourhood and I believe we just dropped in on people, which by today’s standards seems rude.

I remember we visited many people who didn’t have children, so I sat around and drank hot chocolate and ate cookies which may explain my continual eating obsession. Later in the 50’s I can remember visiting my Aunt and Uncle giving me a chance to watch TV, something I had never seen before (and have a coke and eat cookies).

Visiting has gone from my life. It just went out of fashion. Maybe as someone who lives not near family, it has gone, and families still do it. I have not lived near family since 1978, and therefore my relationship with visiting seems to have ended. As well, everyone has a car, and lots of extracurricular activities to keep them busy, so it never occurs to people to just visit. I also am an only child so I eliminate brothers and sisters and their family and my wife’s sister lives in Texas.

Last weekend a friend had broken his leg, and we went and had a visit. We brought a bottle of wine, had a few snacks and went home, happy and smiling. Everyone had a good time for a few hours, and no one had to do anything extraordinary.

It was a visit, of course. There were no kids directly involved, and we talked about our kids and our mutual friends and the broken leg, and it was good.

I want to visit more often.